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教研札记  

2016-07-01 06:48:03|  分类: 教学 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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“后高考”写作教学

2016624,星期五

孙子读初二,下周期末考试,今天在家温书迎考。下午3点多,他拿出学校发的英语提纲,要我帮他复习。接过来翻阅,发现是2张半8开双面复印纸,印着几个单元的词组和句型,英汉对照,密密麻麻。我先照着材料读汉语词组,他说英文短语;接着我念英文句子,他说汉语意思。这种翻译式复习近乎无聊,有点不耐烦。时间快到4点,马上要出去锻炼,跟朋友一块打球。急中生智,从复习材料中抽出几个短语,拟了一个写作题目,说:“照题目要求写一篇英语作文,等我回来后检查”。以下是作文题目和他的作品。

be careful of, be worried about, be sure, be ready for, be strict with五个短语写一则故事,字数不限,短语顺序不拘,但要注意内容连贯。

黄方旭

Mrs. Mary has a daughter, Lucy. She is 15 years old. Mrs. Mary love her daughter very much. And she is also strict with her daughter.

One day, Mrs. Mary would go out. She told Lucy, “I’m ready for a dinner. Don’t touch anything in this house. Be careful of everything.” Then, she left.

But one hour later, a neighbour called Mrs. Mary by phone. “Come back now! Your house is on fire!”

At once, she went home by bus. When she arrived at home, she saw a group of people has gather beside her house. And there are many firefighters had put out the fire. There are many police, too. The house was destroyed.

Mrs. Mary was worried about her daughter. She rushed to the people. She saw a policeman, and asked him: “How was my daughter?”

“Your daughter?” the policeman asked.

“In that house…” Mrs. Mary said.

“No, no. We are sure there’s no one in the house,” the policeman answered.

“BUT…” Mrs. Mary was scared.

“We can’t find anyone in that house,” the policeman said.

Mrs. Mary was nervous. She shouted loudly: “Lucy! Lucy! Where you are?”

“Mom, I’m here!” Lucy appeared behind.

“Oh, my dear!” Mrs. Mary shouted happily.

“I’m fine! Mom. I jumped out of the window.” Lucy smiled.

晚饭后检查孙子的英语作文,发现他写得蛮长,用5个规定的词语自由发挥,编造了一个合乎逻辑的生活小故事。数了数全文,210个词。很显然,他在构思写作上花了一番心思。故事不仅有人物(Mary, Lucy, neighbour, firefighters, policeman等)、有对话、有情节的写实,还有母女、做饭、火灾、打电话、报警、跳窗等想象。尤其是末尾母亲警察、母女之间的几组对话,形象地描述了一个“精彩”的场面,描绘了一幅 “惊险”的画面。这种讲故事思维品质十分难得,值得点赞。若按高考阅卷评分标准,不考虑字数因素,至少是一篇20分上下的作文,因为它符合题目要求,且自圆其说,既传达了写作意图,又达到了用语言交际的目的。

当然,明眼人一看便知,故事中有不少语言错误,如动词时态(has gather)、第三人称单数(Mary love her daughter)、以及个别句式(there are many firefighters had put out the fire)等,这是不争的事实。然而,这些局部的文法错误并不妨碍整体的言语表达,在写作评价中可归属于次要的东西,完全可以忽略不计。照写长法的观点,教师应善于发现作品的闪光点,肯定其丰富的想象力和形象的表达力,以激发作者的言说欲望。假如纠缠于某些词语拼写和文法错误,可能南辕北辙、事与愿违。比如,出于“为学生好”的初衷,评阅时圈出错误点,每个错点扣1分,要求他先订正错误,再“罚”他各抄写5遍,使其牢记正确的表达形式。这种做法后果是,泯灭学习者的“创作欲”和想象力,扼杀他们学英语的兴趣。从语言认知规律看,学习者的文法错误无须频繁或过度纠正,这些语误有可能在言语实践中得到自我校订、自我调整、自我修复。从外语教学经验看,开发学习者用语言说事、做事的潜力至为重要,特别是,应注重发展学习者语言创新思维的能力,而不是过分关注纠错。

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